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Here's a list of the top 6 Animes that make Pokemon look like Oh my Goddess
These are without a doubt THE WORST animes ever devised by man. |
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FLCL
The winner of our crapfest '04 is FLCL. for the most part, i couldn't even UNDERSTAND this show. it involved a girl with a guitar hitting a kid, a giant iron, a guy with fake eyebrows, and a robot repetively eating a kid. whoever wrote this show should stop writing and kill themself. IT'S JUST THAT BAD! Head: 0 Eye: 0 Total score out of 30: 0 Heart: 0
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Super Milk Chan
This isn't EVEN ANIME! i don't know what to call this. a little girl who curses, fires guns, extorts people.....i don't know what to make of it. all i know is, with it's limited animation, horrible characters and non existant plot line, it ranks #2 in Brandon's crapfest '04 Head: 1/2 Eye: 0 total score out of 30: 1/2 Heart: 0 |
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Mystical Ninja
An older anime that looks like somebody barfed on Dennis the Mennice. The main character looks more like a main character from the Rocky Horror Picture show than a ninja. The characters look and act ridiculous, each episode is self contained so it was at least kinda easy to understand, but there was nothing TO understand except for one thing. This rocky horror picture show reject gets the #3 spot on the worst ever list. Head: 0 Eye: 1 Total Score: 1 Heart: 0 |
Golden Boy
This is a show based on a guy who wanders around Japan doing odd jobs for...some reason or another. You know, when i saw episode 4 i thought maybe i missed something. maybe i just didn't get what was going on. so then i saw the rest of the other 5 episodes. and then i wondered "is there really a god?" This show is quite possibly one of the few shows out there to prove there is no god. With a almost pornographic storyline, a character who's voice half the time is more annoying than jaken from inuyasha combined with Ken from Kaleido star, This show is the equivalent of somebody repeatedly kicking you in the crotch with a golf cleet, and every time you screamed, poured boiling water in your mouth. Head: 0 Eye: 1 Total: 2.5 Heart: 1.5 |
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Magical Play
This show just made me scream "WHAT THE HELL?!!?" for an hour after i saw this show. it's about a young girl who runs around in a fish costume trying to win fights. let me remind you that the fish is alive that she's wearing so it seems a bit disturbing when she rips pieces off to eat. She's met by a guy who repetitively pounds his head until he bleeds, and a woman who wears cats over her chest. go figure. anyway, This show.......i could barely finish the first episode. With a plotline more confused than Michael Jackson's skin color and live clothing, This show ranks #5 on the crapfest '04. Head: 2 Eye: 4 Total Score: 8 Heart: 2 |
Knight Hunters
I picked up this show at a rental store. i'd never heard anything about it (and for good reason), but the animation style looked good, and i hadn't really disliked anything i had rented at that store before, so i decided to rent it. boy, BIG MISTAKE! this show is just plain ludicrous. it bases around these 4 guys whose job it is to take any job that comes there way, from rescue to infiltration, to anything else you can imagine. but let me tell you, this show SUCKS majorly. basically they go into this school where a bunch of kids are committing suicides because they can't get into this elite group. so what happens when a main character sees a character jump to her death? he watches and doesn't act until the last two seconds, but of course, it's too late by then. now if this isn't enough to make you shut it off immediately, there's a ritual to join this club where you have to kill a fellow student member. that's right, you heard me, kill another member of the student body. i don't know HOW this got past the police, FBI, and it even managed to slip past the infamous PTA and Gus the disgruntled janitor, but somehow it did. not only that, but i think if i was the parent and a knife was sticking out of my kid, i'd ask a few questions myself. this show went nowhere, killed off characters you were even remotely interested in, and the main characters are about as interesting as a sack of wet potatoes.
Head: haha...that's a good one. 2
Eye: the only GOOD thing about this show is that it looked nice. only thing i can say good about it. 5
Heart: hahaha.......no...just no. 1
total out of 30: 8
DON'T WATCH THIS SHOW UNLESS IT'S A CHOICE BETWEEN THIS AND FLCL!
See? he's leaving the anime too, apparently he couldn't take it either and decided to take on a new profession as a florist. GOOD MOVE!
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Galaxy Railways
oh sigh. galaxy railways. wow. now THIS is a bad show. The basic premise? trains flying in space. yep, interstellar public transportation. and they fight in battles. oh, did i forget to mention that? yeah. they fight in space too. The plot begins with the captain of one of the best train....ship....things.. as his two kids sneak aboard the train to see their father in action. and of course, the one time they decide to go, yep, you guessed it, the father dies. So now the 2 kida are left with their mother. 3 years later the older brother joins the force, and a year later, he dies. so now it's just down to the younger brother and his mom. so, instead of keeping his mother company considering she lost her husband and eldest son over the past 4 years, he decides to join the space train organization too. yep, i know, he's stupid. but, what can you do? regardless, he ends up in this weird time distortion where he goes back in time to when his brother was still alive, but, he can't save him because this droid which oddly reminded me of C-3P0 said that they couldn't save him because, if they did, time space blah blah blah. so, what does our hero do? that's right. HE LISTENS TO THE ROBOT AND LEAVES HIS BROTHER TO DIE! GOD! what is the MATTER with these people? and that my friends is only the first 2 episodes. yes, i know, i wanted to claw my eyes out too.
Head: umm...WHAT plot? 2
Eye: drawn by the same guy who did captain herlock. old school, but a nice touch. 6
Heart: leaving your brother to die? yeah, nice heart. 2
picture: huh? what the hell am i doing in THIS show?
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Record of Lodoss War: Chronicles of a Heroic Knight
probably the most disappointing sequel to a show i've ever seen, chronicles of a heroic knight takes off in the middle of the first record of lodoss war, right after ghim dies. yeah, sorry all you ghim fans, he's still dead. now, instead of the 13 episode series of the original record, they make chronicles 26 episodes AFTER the 6th episode of record, making it a total of 32. and what a waste the last 26 were. In the original, you meet this young wanna be knight for about 2 seconds, you barely catch his name, which is spark. so, in this new one, the story revolves around him. Supposedly, the deedlit and parn story end not even halfway through and spark and his band of faggots take over to save this girl from being sacrificed by this same villain to revive cardas (god of destruction). (man, this guy never gets a break) during this however, one of my favorite characters orson, dies, (he didn't die in the first series though (wink) ) and then parn and deedlit disappear almost COMPLETELY and it's left up to spark and his gang of misfits to save the day. i'm not even going to get into what happens to ashram and the main villain, it's just too painful.
Extra features: the only good thing about this show are the little bonus chibi cartoons you get at this end. they're the only thing worth watching if you ask me. but, later on, they stop having to do with the plot once parn leaves and gets really gay. but oh well.
Head: the idea was crap, so that's how the show turned out: 3
Eye: animation style, pretty ok. 5
Heart: umm........no... just no. 2
Total out of 30: 10
picture: oh whelp, our other dwarf died, so we got a replacement. and THIS one's got a bowl haircut! see?!
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Blue Gender
Blue gender. basically, a dude wakes up from cryogenic sleep because of his disease about 30 years after he was put under and what does he wake up to? that's right, a giant bug killing everyone in the room. So what does our hero then proceed to do? jump to the rescue perhaps? macgyver an instrument of death out of a plank and 2 paperclips? nope, he pisses himself. you heard me right, he pisses himself. wow......this show is off to a great start. Now he finds himself fighting against these bug.......things... called the blue. don't ask me how they got such a gay name, i don't know. couldn't they have called them like, "the devastators" or something cool like that? no, they're called "the blue." you better watch out for those yellows, i hear they're pretty nasty, but i digress. Anyway, this guy has to learn how to fight against these bugs to get off earth and how people who weren't saved by the colony weren't worthy and has to watch as a girl gets eaten by a bug.......mmmm.....tasty. and of course, all this is going on as Eric Stuart is the voice actor (aka trunks). so wait. a guy in a post apocalyptic world trying to fight off unstoppable enemies while all his friends have died around him? wow, that must have been a stretch for eric. After the first season, when the party goes from 10 people to 2, they finally reach the colony, and then the dude becomes a killing machine by going insane because his disease is really exactly why they saved him because he can fight the bugs with this super armor.
Number one, i HATE post apocalyptic. "(whines) oh, humanity is at an end, we either screwed ourselves over, or some random alien we pulled out of our ass has wiped out all buy 10% of the people on earth and we need to fight them!" geez...how many times have i heard THAT plot idea. secondly, the main character just SUCKS. for the first half, he's a whiny little bitch, and for the second half, he's rambo. ....idiotic. regardless, stupid concept, stupid show, and of course, the only other person that didn't die is his love interest.....of course.
Head: not original, it actually reminded me a little bit TOO much of starship troopers : 2
Eye: the visuals were decent in this show. that's the only thing i really can't complain about. 6
Heart: stupid reversed love crap. i love her but she doesn't love me, then the girl goes, i love him but he doesn't know who he is anymore....god. 2.5
total out of 30: 10.5
Picture: Just put the Blue Gender DVD down and nobody gets hurt.
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